Thursday 26 March 2009

My mum sent me a text this morning saying she had bumped into the lady (blue eyebrows) who she also knows as a co-parent from my kid brother's school back when, and she said, that I had 'lights in my eyes' which put lights in my ears to hear it so.

Anyway, bumped into Sahid in Newcross with his girl friend i assume, as they were holding hands. He never told us...he enjoyed the attention i expect, and thought telling us would ruin it : ) Well, we chatted for a minute and mentioned us all catching up.

D is staying with Alice tonight as I have to be up and off to Eltham early.

Wednesday 25 March 2009

ChewingFlum

That is what D calls Chewing Gum, chewingflum.

We had a nice lunch, salmon fingers and rice and a variety of peas and beans.

I am feeling so restless.

My nephew Joel is 11 today.

An Appetite for Mischief

Here i am at 08:47 at my Laptop, just finished a wholemeal pancake. I should be bustling about getting us ready to leave at 8:55 but D woke me up at around 6 something this morning. It gets light earlier now and he thinks it's morning. It's doing my head in though. I am so tired. I went to bed quite early last night too.

Yesterday we had a laugh though, me and D. Playing this game where I hold him in the air with my feet, so he can be an aeroplane, or turning him around and around on the end of my feet, so he can be a helicopter. He was in a mischievous mood yesterday, and was adorably cheeky.

Better go.

_____

Back. D went into the classroom happily when he saw his little friend Mario. I am shattered.

Monday 23 March 2009

The Colour of no money

Saturday I met up with ed and Damien, and they were hungry, so we headed through the usual touristy bustle to McDonalds, and i gave them both these Mc-vouchers I had. Even though i am supposed to be vegetarian now, i found myself ordering a quarter pounder with cheese. I also found myself trying to ignore the moo-feel that i get when i eat beef.

later, what with D away with his daddy, i bought a bottle of vodka with some of the money i had left and headed down to New Cross to meet Jane who was DJing.

for not the first, second or even third time in my life, i was the queen of the pool table - men were queuing up to beat me, simply because they couldn't believe a blonde was dominating the table for so long, seeing off men left right and centre and potting and placing superbly.

Jane, Karen and i also met this guy, Sahid. It all started when Jane and I went to the bar to order some soda water and lime with which to pour the vodka i had bought into. He was at the bar writing away. I didn't pay much attention, even when Jane said he was alright looking, but then for no reason did this thing where i slapped the bar to make the page of his book flick upward. After that whenever he tried to press it down it wouldn't stay down, so there must have been a breeze in there anyway, and that's how we all got talking. He said he liked soda and lime too. I said it was better with vodka, as he ordered himself a soda and lime. We walked off.

Then Jane and me stopped and conferred, and i don't remember who suggested it, but we nominated her to offer him a shot of vodka in his drink. He acquiesced, and that was that, we all hang out together that night, me and him taking to the pool table, following which i beat him twice, (but he was quite a good player), and he proceeded to watch me play and cheer me on as i thrashed a group of Romanians, one by one, who were staying in the hostel upstairs.

Anyway, Jane said she found him sexy, Sahid that is, and I said, I don't. Karen said she did, but i didn't get it. Meanwhile, one of the Romanian guys kept coming back for more, and with each shot huddled, crouched and discussed with his friends the best way to take a shot - that was how much he needed to beat me. He never did. Well not that game. He told me he had his own cue. Don't they all?

Then Some other guy came on, I noticed he had a deformed hand, but he was good and quite confident to start with. Sahid and I joked that if I took my cardi off, to reveal my sheer blouse underneath, he would go ga-ga and lose, it wasn't personal to him, just an idea, the funny thing was, not long after i took it off, he potted the black in the middle of the game and lost. Who knows. Then this Chinese guy came on, and when he potted the white, suddenly threw his pool cue down on the table, and stormed off shaking his head, grimacing but amused, amidst a hail of laughter. It was odd. He was one of the better players. Anyway, for this game I'd put my cardi back on, what with the fact whenever I looked up, there was a set of hungry eyes gleaming in my direction from some shadow or light spot in the bar.

Finally after all the vodka plus the ones Karen bought, i lost interest in pool, and lost on the black with a silly shot, handing it (with some relief) over to my manic opponent, who in his desperation to win, had run upstairs to get his very own black pool cue. He made some reference to it, as if to say that was why he was doing so well, but he was doing so well cause i was drunk, and a little tired. One of his friends, who said he was from Chile, then Italy, but actually had rather Eastern European burr to his voice, told me he knew that I had let his friend win, and that I was very talented and had lovely 'white skin', and that Sahid was lucky to have me as a friend. Sahid, it turned out, was staying upstairs and knew the guys, and he told me that while they were a bit seedy, they were alright. And Sahid said to me when I came off the table, 'I don't want to play him, I wanna play the winner - you', which I liked. So Sahid played the manic Romanian, who had given me a (greatly relieved and assured) kiss on the cheek after beating me. Anyway, Sahid beat him.

The bands had been coming on and off all night, and some were just too loud for me, I prefer gentler stuff, but Jane and Karen were also DJing a loud guitary DJ set, and Sahid really loved it. Jane promised she'd put on Amy Winehouses 'wake up alone' for me, which she did at the end when the lights went up, and to which I danced and mimed away to. By the end of the evening me and Jane had both given Sahid a peck on the lips at his great surprise, and not that he wasn't a great bloke or anything, but it was because of the booze, I mean this is exactly what it does - alcohol can add eroticism, or sensuality where previously there had been none - before I leant in taking him by surprise and planting a soft mwa on his lips, I'd just knocked back a slammer. And I'd honestly not fancied him. It was funny, I think he found us quite a surprise, but he sent me a text saying we'd made his night by the time I had got home.

the next day on Mother's day, I was alone, 'cause Dylan was with his dad, But that was cool 'cause I spoke to him on the phone. I had a few drinks on my own, watched Shallow Hall on TV and fell into a deep rewarding slumber.

Saturday 21 March 2009

It is early in the morning, well, 09:27. But D first roused me at something like 06:00 a.m! I was devastated to be pulled like a miserable tortoise from a rather fascinating dream. It was literally torture trying to beg him not to roll over my back, or wiggle me with his feet. Eventually we went downstairs and I lay on the sofa and put a cartoon on for him. But then D announced that he wanted ice-cream. Though I had planned to make us semi-whole-meal pancakes for breakfast, this seemed a great idea, so very weak and weary I got him a bowl of ice cream and he was the happiest little boy ever.

Then i decided to have an espresso, beucase its just too cruel to try and rest, but be continually needed in some way. I am now about to tuck into another and feel a little more able to prance about as is the way on Saturday mornings with my little jumping bean D. He is right now sitting on the little side table eating an apple. Me too, at my desk. Crunch.

Anyway, yesterday, early evening, before Janey came round, while it was still light, but pushing to dusk, I looked at the washing machine still half wrapped up in its polywhatsitcalled and plastic.

Damn you, I thought, I can do this. So I made myself a fierce coffee and felt my IQ rise a notch or 20, and then, like a little barbarian, I just went for the washing machine with new found determination thinking, there are only so many wires and so many sockets, & I realised the only thing that holds me back (or anyone) is the misnomer that someone else knows how to do it, but never you.
When i had finished connecting bits, I lay on the floor and pushed the bastard into its nook with my feet. Then later Mark my neighbour who is a plumber by trade popped in as planned to check i had done it OK, or to see what i needed, he said it was put together fine.

He just needed to use some special plumber tape to keep the grey pipe plugged into the sink pipe and a few other finishing touches. But truly, i was the main plumber on that job.

He told me that the reason the machines are so heavy is cause they have concrete at the top and the bottom, plus, he told me you have to make sure the grey tube is higher than the sink so that the shitty water from washing up don't run into the washing machine - so now I feel that I could set up and install any washing machine any where in the land.

So anyway, Janey arrived, just as Mark was finishing, with a little bag with V&C in it, and he told us this chilling story, while sipping on a can of V&C we had just passed him (Urban myth he said, but could be true).

WELL...his friend, had a friend (o'course!) who went to stay in the village of Glastonbury with his mates, to take mushrooms together. They all went on a walk, and they got nutted, one of them getting too nutted, so they said to him, Go Back to the house. So he did. A little while later, he called them frantic, saying, 'you won't believe this but i found a fairy, a little fairy! come back!'

When they got back, the guy was cut and scratched and torn. But he was ecstatic with excitement, and said, look, look, and opened the cupboard to reveal a little midget woman he had abducted from the bus stop on his way back.

not just a plumber then eh? But friend of a friend of a very disturbed friend.

Bye

Friday 20 March 2009

Paper Planes

Listening to the MIA song. It's so good. I wonder if i shall ever hate it? It is sometimes possible to go off stuff you once loved.

D is happy, playing with his cars in this lovely afternoon, daffodil toned light, so kindred with the season.

Jane is round later, no doubt V&Cs and stuff.

Still found no one to do my washing machine, but i think next door man will do it for me, if i do the right smile at the right time, with the just right amount of sweetness in it, and just the right amount of wily-ness. : )

Thursday 19 March 2009

My new washing machine has arrived, and now all I have to do is find someone to help me install it. The drop-off men were gonna do it, then said I didn't have the right parts, and one of them also said 'if i break dahn rahnd 'ere I ain't gonna drop in and borrah yuh tools', about my little tool box, with its poxy little screw drivers in it, and useless bits and bobs. I suppose it would be useful to a mouse wanting to make a stowaway raft if there is ever a flood in the kitchen.

Anyway off to Alice's to baby sit, so her and Danny can go together to his gig tonight. It will be quite fun actually cause Alice's eldest who is nearly 11 is a laugh, and we get the giggles, especially last time when I opened this so called ready made pancake mix and added the amount of milk needed, but the pancakes ended up being rubbery dough balls. I actually served one up to Joel for a joke. But it was funny and I was doubled up laughing as I served it to him.

Tuesday 17 March 2009

Proud Mummy

I have written something that i mentioned already, so i am going to write about something that i havent. I am really happy because D's nursery teacher told me he has amazing focus, and sees his little creative projects through to the end, and that he is good on their class room computer. Also he is a loyal friend, because when his mate was told off and asked to sit in a chair, D took a another chair and sat next to him. Ahhh : ) He is so clever, and sweet and kind and funny.

Just gave D his bath, and we played this game, where i pour water from high up, and say 'here comes the waterful', and he has to dodge the stream of water. He loves it, and shrieks and giggles. We also made soap cakes and pies with all the bubbles.

Monday 16 March 2009

It was a lovely weekend. My dad's party went well. First we were at the pub, where we had the back room,

then later, after pub closing we all ended up back at my dadnmums house drinking rose till 5 am, even my dear little grandpa. My mum and aunt also braved the pre-dawn hours. Anyway, the evening was good and even though i felt quite drunk by 3 am i just wanted to stay up drinking and talking, and there was Dan, Sean (18) and Old Sean (about 60 and my dads best school mate) and Antony my uncle, as well as the others i mentioned, who stayed up and boozed on.Young Sean was so sweet, he produced a fiver to pay for my cab home, when at about 5ish when I decided it was time to go. I had asked my mum for a pair of trainers to swap my black peep toe slip ons with, to walk home in. She produced a bran new pair of white Nike's, which was quite cool, and I am going to use them to walk Dylan to school today. Sean was kind, and that's exactly what Damien did for me at his b'day party recently. They all know i am a little broke at the mo.

Well in the cab i remember the driver telling me he was from Afghanistan, and asked me what i thought about the place and if i would go there. I said maybe not at the moment. When i got in, he called me from his phone, (the number he called on to say he was outside) and i picked up, but he had hung up. God knows what he wanted, in fact it was probably an accident.

The next day i slept as much as i could. I could see and feel that it was a beautiful day outside, and i thought how lovely it was as the breeze twirled in through the open window across my dozing face.

I am off to the V&A museum now with J. Looking forward to a lovely day.

XXXXX

Friday 13 March 2009

Mango Baby

Just made pancakes for me and D. Just what i needed - that with a nice coffee. Caned off a whole bottle of rose last night while I watched some comic relief stuff, and the children dying of Malaria in Africa had been in tears.

I don't really feel hungover, but as D woke me up at 6.40 am, i do feel tired. Being a full time single mummy is draining but yet it has been worth every broken nights sleep (every night! 0 ) ) and the nearly two mile walk to school every morning, back home again, school again, home. It keeps me fit - all of it, the whole mummy game. Now I feel ready to move on to my career aspirations once again, and have applied to do volunteer work to get me started. I am also doing a little set soon with Dan on jazz guitar, we are a really good team. Dan is my brother. I am so happy cause i thought i had lost my way with the music, but now i see it's not so much a jazz band i need, but to sing, and with the simplest of accompaniments, though Dan's style is both simple and intricate, he is good.

D off to his dad's this evening. Now I could go out later and film the other Danny's gig as he did ask me - my sister will be on one Camera me on the other, it might be nice to do it, but the thing is I am tired and feel that a night on the sofa, watching TV will be so lovely.

It's my dad's b'day tomorrow. Got no money to get him a gift, so I'll make him something, or draw something, maybe. Though i love a drink, not sure i should bother tonight. Still that rose last night went down well, it so did.

But getting up at 6.40 is toooooo early. But D is so sweet and cute and soft and funny first thing in the morning, he just makes me smile straight away, unless he is ripping my eye lids open and i am beyond knackered.

he is my mango baby. x x x

Tuesday 10 March 2009

watched some TV last night, had a few sips of V&C. The Jordan interview with P Morgan was actually quite captivating. She looked like a princess but talked like a balcony bird on a block of flats. I turned the sound of to see the effect, and she looked charming. Regal. Enough about her.

This morning i took 'a turn' around the area, and went into Waterstones to check out this book that was recommended to me, but actually wasn't quite right. Then as i came out, a light rain was falling and i walked along in it, feeling nice.

Just had some egg on toast, with fishfingers, now i am practically vegitarian, the one thing i do adore is fish. Cod, salmon (not the slobbery stuff) tuna, mackeral, haddock, pollack and anchovies with avocado and dressing.

The Class was....a little demading on my attention, at times it was like sitting at the back of the classroom, most of it done in real time, and i really felt fidgety, don't think i was in the right mood for it. It was way too long. Many of the grey haired couples in the cinema were blown away by it. Me, i need something more hellish than that.

Monday 9 March 2009

Day did a gig last night, and it was Alice's birthday, we combined the two and it was a laugh. Alice fell into one of the musicians while he was doing his set. Well, that's what it's all about.

We played pool, drank rose, vodka and tequila - Ali and me got chatted up loads, well there wasn't much totty in the bar, mostly geezers standing in huddles - but I like being appreciated, unless my admirer has crap all over his teeth, and onion odour, that's not so enriching.

Well, my baby boy is at this dads till tomorrow, so i am enjoying some blissful time to myself. I am gonna go and see 'the class' at 3 o'clock. I'll let you know how it goes.

Tuesday 3 March 2009